Training to Improve

After running 20 miles a couple of days ago, I had an epiphany. I think that my running is actually improving.

Last week was rough. I had a lot of nasal-to-throat drainage on Wednesday, and by the end of the work day on Thursday I was full-blown sick. Joe pushed me through 5 miles that evening, but my illness trumped everything Friday morning when I had to cut 5 miles down to 2.5. With reluctance I chose to rest on Saturday and Sunday, despite needing to run 10 and 20 miles respectively, in an effort to get well. Also, I needed to make sure that Joe's surprise 30th birthday party was a blast.

It wasn't for naught! By Sunday evening, in spite of the guilt of not running all weekend, I felt healthy. AND all of the birthday festivities were awesome. We got a good night of sleep on Sunday, I slept in on Monday, and then went out to run that 20-miler. I had been so good about doing all of my long runs since training for the Rite Aid Cleveland Marathon started that I didn't want to let one sick weekend ruin my streak, which I imagine would subsequently also ruin my confidence in training and my ability to perform on May 19th.

Back to the point, I think that my running is actually improving. I already said that, right?

What was this aforementioned epiphany exactly? What am I doing better now than before? And why did I notice any of it?

I run comfortably.
While training for my first two marathons last year, I generally tried to run hard in every training run as if I was some badass, experienced runner. I ran for the enjoyment of looking at my splits on Garmin Connect. I relished in finishing training runs in goal race time.

I was not and am not a badass, experienced runner. I was disappointed in myself for not running negative splits for an entire long run. I felt like all of the work I had done was for nothing if I ran 30 to 45 seconds slower per mile than my race goal pace.

Lately, I've been running at a pace that feels good. I am honest with myself about how much I can tolerate. I find a pace at which I know I can run faster, and I choose to maintain it or even slow down. Instead of doing what I can, I'm happy simply knowing that I can.

I endure in discomfort.
I suck at golf. I always like the idea of going to play, and I am usually in good spirits until my second stroke. At best I triple bogie hole after hole. I turn into a sourpuss and although I never quit, I become huffy and puffy and as a result, I play worse and worse. Eventually, I start just claiming stroke limit on each hole so that I don't need to play it out.

I've never had such a meltdown while running, but I've definitely done some mental "getting to know myself" under crappy conditions. Last summer was blazing hot and humid, which resulted in running shorter distances  than I should have, rather than slowing down or even walking now and then. While training for my first two marathons, I only ran one of my two planned 20-milers because it was just too hard. Wind kicks up toward the end of a run? Meh, I'll just call it quits.

No more of that. I am training with a purpose; I have goals, and I'm less likely to achieve if I don't do what I know I need to do. No more quitting, no more complaining, and no more excuses.

I finish strong.
I used to train hard from start to finish. No warm-up, just straight into race pace. It was fine on shorter runs of 5 or 7 miles, but it was a challenge to maintain week after week on long runs. The last few miles always showed the same thing: slower and slower splits, struggling to even finish training runs. Oh, you want to "race" to the end of the driveway? You have fun with that. I'll just stay back here all slow because I can't run any faster.

I mentioned earlier that I'm consciously saving my energy when I know that it's there. All of that running comfortably pays off when for the last half or even full mile, I can kick it up a notch to finish faster than race goal pace. I can "win" those sprints around the corner to the driveway. Well, less and less since Joe is getting faster and faster. Even for him, it's due to training smarter. This shouldn't be exclusive to training, either; even in a race, don't you prefer to finish looking strong for the camera? I feel a lot better saving it for the end.

Improvements aren't just measured by PRs and medals. I've been thinking a lot about the way that I feel during and after training runs. Even if I don't beat that pesky 3:53 in Cleveland on May 19th, I know that I am now a better runner than I used to be.